The interpersonal element

Alexander Technique is based on principles that are fundamental to all spheres of life. It may have an obvious influence on poise and movement, but the practice of Alexander Technique can also have an impact on one’s very personality. With improved sensitivity to our predispositions, we can be more discerning in choosing our responses. Alexander Technique helps us to regulate how we react to others and how we express ourselves. In this way, Alexander Technique may support the user if tensions arise in interpersonal relationships.

The use of the self 

FM Alexander coined the phrase ‘use of the self’ to refer to an individual’s way of using her or his body and mind, which includes posture, mannerisms, gait and various idiosyncrasies of movement and personality. The concept of ‘use of self’ is more holistic than any of these elements on their own. Further, it embraces the fact that such physical expressions of a person’s identity are inseparable from their attendant or predisposing psychologies, spiritual, beliefs, life experiences, education, social influences and so forth.

Meeting with people 


Emotional, psychological and physical predispositions are part of an individual’s personality. When meeting with another person, the match or clash of beliefs or opinions inevitably manifests in physical sensation: a very tangible experience of relaxation or tension, maybe even a ‘gut feeling,’ in response to the company of another person. Possibly, some unconscious processes identify cues in the other person’s use of self and generate a response in our own bodies. We may experience a visceral response to a person without consciously understanding why, and these bodily sensations may even contribute to a tendency to like or dislike someone. Our response to the other may be further influenced by our habits, predispositions or unconscious prejudices.  Relative levels of ‘tension’ in relationships are therefore physical as well as emotional and psychological.  


Promoting bodily ease in the face of conflict


The practice of Alexander Technique raises our awareness of tensions and the impact they have on our experience. A decision to desist from a habitual response opens a possibility for experiencing a situation differently. If another person's conflicting opinions no longer cause us to tighten and feel uncomfortable, this may improve our capacity to accept or learn from the opposing view. This may also improve our ease irrespective of our disagreement with the other’s perspective, or whether or not either party’s view changes.

Enhancing comfort, confidence and rapport


The choice to release unwanted tension and to engage positive coordination is at the core of Alexander Technique. Creating physical comfort may help us hear the message from our conversation partner with less prejudice, and the associated psycho-physical sense of confidence may give us access to more open and genuine verbal and non-verbal expression. Further, when we embody the Alexander Technique process, our balanced physicality is communicating respect and acceptance to the other person which may, in turn, lead to improved rapport.  


Application to conversation


Alexander Technique functions as both a remedial and a preventative practice. To use Alexander Technique is to engage in the process of inhibition and direction discussed elsewhere on this blog. In encounters where you perceive your psycho-physical reactions to be creating discomfort, use Alexander Technique to give you comfort and choice of response. In conversations where tension is not apparent, use the Technique to increase your awareness, cultivate confidence and improve your communication - the fundamental element affecting interpersonal relationships.